"What Am I Going to do For the Rest of My Life?"
That was my thought as I was in the Fenwick Library at around 9 PM. The college staff was telling me that the area was about to close soon.
My head was down on the desk.
I was so lost.
At the time, I wanted to become a financial advisor and follow in my father's footsteps.
My father was a Vietnamese immigrant and came to America by boat at the age of 13 years old with pocket change. He became a role model for me while living his American Dream.
As a son, I never wanted to disappoint. I studied every single day from opening to closing hours my freshman year of college.
I wanted to get my Series 7 Certification to get into the financial services industry. I had wanted to live the corporate life and have financial independence as soon as possible.
But I was sad and in despair. I had no idea why.
I went to my grandparent's house at around 10 PM. They were surprised I showed up so late at night. As I walked and sat at their dinner table, I started sobbing. The pressure I have received was so much because I had wanted to make my whole family proud since I was a young boy.
"Don't worry. Be happy. Have fun!"
I was in shock. Those words always stuck with me.
That was my grandpa who said that. After 7 years in prison from the Vietnam War, he was still happier than me. My grandpa was so pure. He didn't have the same opportunities as I did growing up. He didn't have a chance to pursue his dream career.
My whole family didn't have a chance for many things in life as I did, yet my grandpa was the one who has always been joyful his whole life.
That night, I walked back to my car, thinking:
I'm so grateful for everything.
No matter how much I've suffered, it's nowhere near as close to what my family has been through.
They've faced many difficulties in life trying to survive with food on the table. On the other hand, I had this imaginary constant pressure put upon myself for no reason.
My family didn't go to America for me to live their dreams, they came for me to live my own dreams.
I realized that I wanted to take the path of adventure. The path of the unknown.
To follow the path of contribution to the world.
Nobody knows what they are doing. The ones that say they do are completely lying.
One thing is for sure, however. The ones who make it are the ones who start and get going with grit.
If you know you're the hardest worker in the room, it's just a matter of which vertical and decisions you choose to excel in.
I'm not the only one who has experienced life-changing moments like these. Many people suffer through this daily.
Still, we completely forget that these experiences have become amazing moments that eventually lead to decisions for a better future.
So, If there was one takeaway to always remember...
Don't Worry. Be Happy. Have Fun!
Stay Classy,
AP